My birthday gift to myself since turning 40 five years ago
has been to invite treasured girlfriends for a weekend away. Think of the people who are most life giving,
most inspiring, most dear, most missed and I dare you to invite them on a
trip!
If you plan it….they
will come!
Who doesn’t need a break from our hectic lives as wives,
mothers and professionals!
Here is what I’ve learned to incorporate into these gatherings
to make them monumental, unforgettable and inspirational!
1. Invite a Group
of with Commonalities & Cohesiveness: Maybe your girlfriend getaway is a ‘reunion’
where your group already has bonds together from past experiences. I have a need to reconnect with old friends,
those from my past that I’ve served alongside and who’ve shared a pivotal
period of life with me. They are spread
across the country and most don’t live close so it is precious time to spend
time with them. Think of friends who you
immediately reconnect with like you’ve never been apart. I invite like-minded women, often women who’s
lives and faith inspire me and those whom I long to spend time with and learn
from. I know they’ll enjoy each other,
as well. Think of common relational or
life-experience threads that will unite the group. Avoid the narcissistic drama queens who
dominate without emotional awareness and demand the spotlight shamelessly.
2. Be Intentional
About Fostering Meaningful Conversations: Women are energized and inspired from
thoughtful and emotional connections. From
Appreciative Inquiry, I’ve learned the power of ‘…..positive questions’ and the
rich, meaningful conversations that inspire us to become better people as we
learn from one another. Have some
questions prepared and infuse them into dinner conversations, as the chairs are
circled up at the beach, lounging over coffee in the morning. Go around and give each person time to share.
This prevents one person from monopolizing the time and allows everyone a
chance to reflect and respond. A few of
my favorites are:
·
What was your most satisfying experience from
this past year? What are you most
grateful for or proud of?
·
How are you fostering gratitude…spiritual
growth… being present in the moment…more time with your
spouse/beloved/children….self-care…into your life?
·
What do you want more of?
·
What has inspired you recently?
·
Depending on the phase of life of the
group…young children, teen years or empty nest… what is currently most
challenging, most rewarding?
3. Keep the
Schedule ‘Loose’: One of the
best refreshers of a girlfriend getaway is to have a break from the busy-ness
of life. Several days that are free from
rushing, shuttling, working, cooking and cleaning can be revolutionary and can create
space for new ideas, creativity, rest and refreshment. Be flexible and have a general plan for the
time, but don’t follow a strict schedule.
Some of the best connections, laughs and talks often happen just in
‘hanging out’ so leave room for this.
4. Reconnect With
Your ‘True Self’: I find that
being with old friends helps me remember who I am, who I’ve been and who I’ve set
out to become. These friends know me at
my core and there have been difficult times when I’ve lost touch with the real
me. Rich times with true friends remind
you of your strengths, what’s best about you, memories that help you remember yourself
and provide life-giving, sometimes life-saving encouragement. I leave the getaway with my ‘bucket filled’,
feeling loved, ready to embrace my life again back home. Have you lost yourself? Has your current situation, challenge or
difficulty produced a different, foreign you?
Girlfriends can bring you back and inspire a new course or perspective, perhaps
inspire new courage.
5. Enjoy a Break
From Your ‘Fishbowl’: A lonely leadership position or a stressful,
demanding job, or a difficult relationship definitely requires some off-duty
time to recharge and refocus priorities in the company of encouraging
friends. One of my dear friends is a
pastor’s wife and relishes a break from who she’s expected to be in this role
back home. Maybe a break from your husband and kids can bring new appreciation
and love for your life together. A swim
in the ocean after living in a fishbowl can be life-changing and perspective-altering.
Great food and wine
is a must! Nothing like the sun, surf
and the sounds of the beach or the beauty of nature to awaken the soul! Give yourself the gift of time with
girlfriends, away from our hectic lives. You’ll be a better wife, mother,
coworker, leader and friend after a time away like this!
I’d love to hear comments from outstanding girlfriend
getaway experiences out there!
Love this...every year three of my best friends and I re connect. We will be together in June here in CO for a Beth Moore weekend.. 2 will travel from Nebraska and 1 from Cape Cod... The 2 from Nebraska met me in Mexico in January for a mini reunion. We always bring each other a small gift and usually have moments of reminisicing about the years we all lived in Nebraska. We have been having these girlfriend get aways for nearly 20 years...always find time for getting into the Word and prayer...so refreshing?
ReplyDeleteI believe that many women have soul fatigue; a phenomena that appears because we are working outside the home, managing the home, circling around children, trying to exercise regularly, trying to keep the meals "healthy", and caring for aging parents that may or may not have come around us to lend a hand during these busy years.
ReplyDelete24-96 hours away is a must to restore and to refresh ones soul. Jami, you are a lovely, gracious and generous host and I appreciate your thoughtfulness on initiating meaningful conversations. I could not agree more about creating an environment that is not rushed or scheduled and where great food, wine, and a lot of laughing is in surplus. Blessings!! xoxo